


Love Cuts a Million Ways

by c00kie



Series: cradle of love [1]
Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, Older Man/Younger Woman, Romance, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2015-12-29
Packaged: 2018-05-10 03:52:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5569969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/c00kie/pseuds/c00kie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He wonders if she's doing the same thing he is, distancing herself from him so she isn't tempted. He can't blame her, he's too old, too cynical for someone as young and idealistic as her.<br/>But when he closes his eyes, it's her he sees.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love Cuts a Million Ways

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ashisfriendly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashisfriendly/gifts).



> MERRY LATE CHRISTMAS, ASHLEY!!!! I LOVE YOU MORE THAN WAFFLES. 
> 
> A note about the warning: While there is no sex in his story, there is an age difference and Leslie is 16/17. Better safe and whatever.

 

Ben's lived in D.C for exactly eight hours, when he hears a knock at his door. He's apprehensive as he goes to answer the door. The only person he knows in the city so far is his boss, the building manager who gave him his lease and the movers who got his couch into his apartment.  His apprehension only increases when he sees it's a girl, holding a plate of cookies.

"Hi," she says,"I'm Leslie Knope, I live next door and I am here to welcome you to the building."

"Um, okay." He knows instantly that it's the wrong thing to say, and the way her smile falls and her eyes narrow confirms it. "I mean, thanks. Sorry, it's been a long day. I'm Ben Wyatt."

Her smile returns and even though Ben's only known her for a minute, he's relieved. He takes the plate from her and it's heavy, full of cookies of nearly every different variety.

"I hope you're not one of those guys who doesn't eat carbs or sugar."

Ben laughs, mostly at the way she says it like it's a crime on par with human trafficking. "Nah. My friend Chris is though, so be warned."

"I'm sorry."

She's pretty, with blonde hair that curls at her shoulders and blue eyes and freckles scattered over her wide face. She's sixteen, seventeen at the most.

He can barely remember being seventeen.

"Well, I hope you enjoy the cookies. You can bring my plate back when you're done."

Ben looks at the plate, then at her. "You know, I could use some help eating these-"

There's a voice in his head that screams at him, demanding to know what he's thinking for inviting her in, but she says, "Okay!" and pushes her way past him.

He eats one cookie, sure that his heart is going to burst from the sugar content. She eats two. They make small talk. He asks her about school, she asks him where he works. Her eyes light up when he tells her he's a political consultant.

"I'm going to be president someday," she says, so matter of fact that he believes it. "You can run my campaign."

"It'll be my pleasure," Ben says. She's already got his vote.

So," Leslie says, looking around his apartment. "is this a one or two bedroom?"

"One."

"Ah. Ours is a two bedroom. But your living room is larger."

"Huh," Ben says, not sure what to do with that information.

"Well, what should we do first?"

"Huh?"

Leslie laughs at Ben's confusion. It's a delighted cackle that makes his heart jump as high as the moon. "Unpacking, silly. What should we do first?"

"Don't you have better things to do?" A seventeen year old girl shouldn't want to help an old man like him unpack. She should want to go to dances with her quarterback boyfriend or have slumber parties with her girl-friends or roller skate in the park. No, no. Don't think about her on roller skates.

"Nope."

Ben sighs. "Yeah, okay. You can unpack my plates and bowls. I'll uh, go finish up in the bedroom."

She smiles and he leaves, needing a moment alone to calm down. He can't remember the last time he felt this way about a girl so quickly. Maybe not since his high school girlfriend, Cindy.

He distracts himself though by unpacking his action figures and arranging them on his dresser.

"What is that?"

Ben startles at her voice. "Um, it's Gordo."

She just makes a face. "A whato?"

"Gordo? He shot Han? Actually Han shot first but then George Lucas went back and changed it because he thought it made Han more sympathetic and worthy of Leia if-"

"Ben, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You've never seen _Star Wars_?"

She shrugs, looking half apologetic. "I'm sorry?"

"Don't be," Ben says, putting Gordo down. "We can fix this."

"Um, okay." She looks at little frightened. He tries not to think about how it's adorable as he moves past her out his bedroom, determined to find his original trilogy dvds.  

She sits on the floor with him and helps him unpack his DVDs and put them away. She even catches onto his organizational system.

Half way through, he realizes how late it is, and decides there's no time to watch a movie. "I'm getting hungry, you want something?" If she helped him unpack, the least he can do is get her something to eat. It's the right thing to do.

"There's a great diner two blocks from here."

Oh. He was thinking more along the lines of a taco truck or a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. l"Um, I'm not sure if that's such a good idea-"

"Come on," Leslie says, hopping up and offering Ben her hand. He takes it, unable to say no to her.

As they're walking out, he notices all of his dishes are on the counters.

"I wasn't sure where you wanted them to go."

"You can't reach, can you?"

Leslie's nose crinkles as she scrunches her nose and growls under her breath. "No."

Ben laughs. "You can't reach. So what do you do at your place? Do you have a step stool?"

"Shut up, jerk," she says, pushing him forward.

-

The next morning, Ben goes for a run. He's never been a morning person, preferring to stay in bed and sleep for as long as possible, but considering he spent the night dreaming of defiling Leslie, he figures an early morning run will do him some good. Plus, he figures it'll be a good way to learn the neighborhood. Leslie pointed out things on their way to the diner, but he hadn't really been paying attention, to lost in the sound of her voice to really hear her words.

A woman runs by him, her brown hair bouncing in her ponytail. She gives him a smile and he smiles back as they pass.

He looks back to see her stretching on a street lamp. For a minute he debates with himself, before realizing he's being ridiculous. Leslie's too young for him, way, way too young. This woman though, is attractive and his age.

He runs back to get her number.

With her number secure in his phone, Ben starts to head back to his apartment, only to run into Leslie. It's only eight on a Sunday, surely she should be sleeping in like a normal person.

When he says this, she shakes her head, confused. "I've been awake since five."

"What time did you go to bed?" Ben asks as they go back into their building.

"One thirty."

He stares, unable to believe her. She should be yawing, her eyes should be dull, but no, she's just as energetic as she was the night before. "So, I was thinking we could watch _Star Wars_ tonight."

"Oh, I uh, can't," Ben says, pushing the elevator button. "I have a date tonight."

"Oh. Okay." She gives him a small smile, but as he looks at her, Ben slowly comes to the conclusion that he'd much rather watch _Star Wars_ with Leslie than go on a date with someone else.

"I'm sorry-"

"It's fine," she says, smiling wider this time. "Raincheck, right?"

"Raincheck," Ben promises.

-

It's not a promise he keeps. He means to, but work becomes hectic and while things with Michelle don't work out, he still goes on dates with various women, most which end back at his place. Also, he just never really ses her, not even in the hallway or elevators, and when he does, it's like there's a piece of the puzzle missing. She smiles at him, will answer him when he ask how she's doing, but she doesn't really engage him in conversation.

He wonders if she's doing the same thing he is, distancing herself from him so she isn't tempted. He can't blame her, he's too old, too cynical for someone as young and idealistic as her.

But when he closes his eyes, it's her he sees.

-

His bathroom sink won't drain. He tries drano, but the problem persists. He tries calling management several times, but they never call back. So figuring he'll have to fix it himself, he searches for a wrench, only to remember that he left his toolbox back in Minnesota. It's raining outside, the last thing he wants to do is go out, so he knocks on Leslie's door, hoping she and her mom have a wrench he can borrow.

When he tells Leslie his problem, she shakes her head. "Oh I should have told you not to go to management for this kind of thing."

"Who am I supposed to go to?"

"Ron."  There's unspoken, 'duh.' She smiles and closes her door behind her. "Come on, I'll take you to him. He should be home. At least I hope he's home, sometimes he goes to his cabin in Virginia and you don't see him for months, but that's usually only when one of his ex wives shows up. But I haven't seen them in awhile so it should be safe."

Her babbles fills the space between the hallway and the elevator ride to the fourth floor. Ron's apartment is on the complete opposite side of the building, making Ben wonder how Leslie even knows him.

And who else does she know?

Ron is a bulky man with a thick mustache. He's holding a glass of whiskey that he sips, saying nothing as Leslie explains why they're there.

"I'll expect payment."

"Oh, sure, no problem," Ben says, "how much?"

"I'll make you a tray of brownies," Leslie says and Ron nods and the two shake on it, leaving Ben confused.

"Ron prefers to trade goods and services," she explains while Ron gets his toolbox.

When he comes back, toolbox in hand, Ben says, "I was trained as an accountant, if you ever want help on your tax-" Leslie hits him on the arm. "Ow!"

"The Internal Revenue Service is a joke, son," Ron says. "The brownies will suffice."

Ron fixes the sink, as well as Ben's garbage disposal, which Ben didn't even know was broken.

"Are you sure I can't pay you?"

Ron's mustache trembles and Ben's half afraid he's going to strangle him for suggesting it, but Leslie saves him by promising the brownies and pushing him out of Ben's apartment.

"Thanks," Ben tells her.

She smiles back. "No problem. I better go make those brownies though, otherwise I'll get a lecture on personal integrity."

Ben laughs. "I wouldn't want that."

"I have it memorized." Her voice drops an octave as she does her impression of Ron. "Leslie, a man is only as good as his word and when you promise him something, it's important that you keep your promise."

"Wow."

"Yeah, so I better go. I'll see you later, Benjamin."

"See ya, Lesliemin." He curses himself, but Leslie just giggles and leaves.

-

Ben meets Leslie's mother in the elevator. She's standing next to Leslie, both are holding bags of groceries.

"Leslie tells me you're our neighbor."

"I am. It's nice to meet you, Mrs-"

"Ms. Griggs Knope," she says, "call me Marlene."

"It's nice to meet you, Marlene." Next to her, Ben catches Leslie roll her eyes. Marlene doesn't catch it though, or if she does, she doesn't point it out. "Uh, Leslie says you're head of education in the city. I bet that's challenging."

"Oh no," Leslie whispers.

"It depends on what you mean by challenging, Ben."

"I mean, uh, you must get a lot of um, heat from the uh, school board and uh stuff."

"Uh stuff?" Marlene glares, not at him, but at Leslie, "I thought you said he was smart."

"He is," Leslie says, and Ben's grateful for the defense, but he's also wondering why it matters to him. He shouldn't care what Marlene thinks, or even what Leslie thinks.

The elevator stops and opens. He lets them go out first, keeping his distance as they walk down the hallway. At least their conversation has shifted, to whether or not they should get a Persian rug.

As soon as Ben gets inside his apartment is change into his swim trunks, ready to swim a couple laps in the building's pool. He grabs his keys and a towel and locks up his apartment just as Leslie's coming out of hers. She's wearing a blue swimsuit with a pair of tiny shorts over them.

"Hi," she says, "Going my way?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess I am," Ben replies, not looking at her. If he looks at her, he will see skin and cleavage and her legs and it's bad enough he sometimes imagines those things, he doesn't need to see it, no matter how much he wants to.

He uses his card key to get them inside, even though she's carrying hers. The room is cold, giving him goosebumps and it smells like chlorine.

It's completely empty except for them.

She sets her towels down on a chair next to his and takes off her shorts. This time, Ben does look, because he can't stop himself. She's tiny, but curvy, with breasts and hips he knows would fit perfectly in his hands. He shakes the thought away, internally reprimands himself. Again.

He uses the ladder to get in, dipping his toes in cautiously to make sure the water isn't too cold. Leslie, however, walks over the deep end and dives in. She doesn't come up though, not for few moments, and in that span of time Ben panics and jumps the rest of the way in, swimming toward her end to get her, but she pops up, exhaling.

"Damn it."

"What the fuck are you doing?"

"I was trying to do a handstand. I just can't seem to get it." She makes a face and even though Ben's furious because he thought for sure she was in danger. Seeing her upset at such a trivial thing calms him. But not much.

"You…" He's not even sure what to say to her. Never to do it again? To warn him next time?

"Race you!"

Ben feels like he's swam 800 laps already. "What?"

"Come on, it'll be fun." She doesn't give him a chance to respond, already swimming to the other side of the pool. "You're losing," she says, when she starts to turn back.

His competitive side kicks in. "We'll see about that," he says, taking off.

-

Sometimes Ben thinks the only thing he has figured out is his career. He's loved politics since he was in high school. He ran for mayor when he was eighteen, lost, went to college to study political science, got his masters while working at the state house in Indiana, and since then has worked on several campaigns, developing his portfolio and reputation. It was his work with his last boss, a state senator, that got him the attention of Jennifer Barkley, who offered him a job with her company in D.C.  He gets to run several campaigns at once. It's like playing multiple games of chess at once.

But it also means a lot of late nights in his office, like tonight. During the day there's people running around and meetings and phone calls. Now, all he has to keep him company is the gentle hum of his computer.

When he's done with the things that absolutely cannot wait until morning, Ben heads home.

He sees Leslie on the other side of the tracks, talking to a tall boy with curly dark hair. Her hair is pinned back and she's wearing a dress made out of teal taffeta.  Looking around, he sees even more girls her age wearing dresses and boys in nice suits. Some are chanting various fight songs.

It must be home coming.

Ben's stomach twists. He's never thought about Leslie dating before, mostly because he never let himself, but seeing it, seeing the way she laughs and the way he puts his hand on her shoulder, it makes him want to punch something.

He looks away, into the eyes of a pretty redhead wearing a Doctor Who t-shirt. It would be so easy to just sit in the empty space next to her and do his Ten impression, but he breaks the eye contact, to look at Leslie and her boyfriend instead.

When he turns back, redhead is reading a book, the opportunity gone.

So that night Ben goes out to a bar that promises half priced beers and live music. The beer is good, the music is okay. It's not his particular taste as it's way too reminiscent of Dave Matthews, but he's not there for the music. He's here to drink and forget that he saw Leslie kiss that boy.

He's here to find tonight's replacement.

"Two shots of tequila, please," the woman standing next to him smiles. She's got brown hair and eyes and cute dimples and he thinks, perfect.

An hour later, Ben's walking Shauna to his building. He stops though, at the sight of Leslie on the front stoop, sitting next to a girl who keeps handing her kleenex.

His stomach twist again, in a way that's far worse than when he saw her in the subway. "Leslie?"

Both she and the other girl look up at him. Leslie smiles, but it doesn't quite reach her eyes. "Oh, hey, Ben. Have you met Ann?"

"Hey," Ann says, lifting her hand in a half hearted wave. Both of them look over at Shauna, and Leslie's smile falls again.

"Um, this is Shauna. Shauna, this is Leslie, she and her mom are my neighbors."

"Hi," Shauna says, dimples showing.

The girls say hello and Leslie even compliments Shauna's jacket, but the scene feels weird to him, in a way he can't quite place.

Okay, he can, but he doesn't want to admit it.

Ann stands up, taking Leslie's hand. "Let's go get some waffles, Les."

Leslie sighs. "Yeah, okay. See you later Ben. It was nice to meet you, Shauna."

"You too!" Shauna returns and Ben watches them walk away before he takes Shauna inside.

-

Ben never sees the boy Leslie was with again. He does keep seeing Shauna though. For his birthday, she tries to cook for him, but ends up setting the smoke detector off instead. Unfortunately, before he can turn it off, it sets the building's alarm off and everyone has to vacate the building, using the stairs.  He figures if it was a real emergency, they would all die by the time they actually made it to the first floor.

When they're out, he goes and finds the building's manager to tell her what happened. When he walks back to where he left Shauna, he finds her and Leslie talking.

They're both wearing the same hat and glove set. He thinks it looks better on Leslie, but he wraps his arms around Shauna.

'I was just telling Leslie what happened," she says, "Some birthday huh?"

"It's your birthday?"

Leslie seems betrayed that he never told her when his birthday was, but it's not like he knows when hers is either.

"Yeah." He plays with Shauna's hair, ignoring the hollow feeling in his chest.

They announce it's safe to go back inside, but Ben doesn't move. He pretends it's because he's waiting because he doesn't want to fight the crowd, but the truth is he'd not moving because Leslie isn't either.

"Well," Leslie says after a while, sounding as awkward as Ben feels, "I'll see you two later."

She starts walking in the opposite direction and Ben can't help but call after her. "Where are you going?"

"To buy you a present," she yells back, and he knows he has no choice but to accept.

Leslie though, doesn't knock on his door to give him his present that night. In fact, he doesn't see her until Sunday afternoon, when Shauna leaves.

He's changing his sheets when he hears her knock at the door. Ben invites her in. She sighs and steps inside, giving him the perfectly wrapped box. He wonders where she found wrapping paper with robots on it.

He sits on his couch to open it, but he notices Leslie's standing, looking everywhere except at him. "Leslie?"

"Yeah?

"You can sit down you know. I don't bite."

Leslie snorts at his joke, but she sits on the couch, as far away from him as possible.

"Are you okay" he asks.

"I'm great!" She grins like that will convince him but it doesn't. "Open your present!"

Ben sighs and opens her gift, revealing a book of _Star Wars_ art. "Wow," he says, flipping through it. "This is so cool."

"You didn't give me a lot of time," Leslie says, still obviously angry at him.

"It's perfect," Ben tells her, making sure their eyes meet as he reaches out and takes her hand. "Thank you."

Leslie's breath hitches and she removes her hand from his and stands up, almost too quickly if the way she sways for a moment is any indication.

"I have to go." She hurries to the door, stopping only because Ben asks her what's wrong.

"Did I do something?" he asks, standing up and going over to her. She remains still, her head bent toward the floor.

"I can hear you."

Ben's not sure if he heard her right or what she means. "What?"

Leslie slowly turns around, squaring her shoulders back as if getting ready for a fight. "I can hear you. Our bedrooms are next to each other."

Oh crap. He studies her, taking in her crimson cheeks. "Oh. I'm sorry."

"It's fine." Leslie shrugs. "Really. I just feel kind of awkward now because…"

"Because?"

Leslie just shakes her head and smiles. "No reason. Anyway, I hope you like your present, Ben."

Ben knows he can't make her stay and that he shouldn't want to. So all he thanks her again and locks the door behind her when she leaves.

-

Even though both Ben's brother and sister invite him to their Thanksgivings, he stays home, figuring he can work and catch up on his Netflix queue.  

It's Marlene who invites him over, claiming it's just pathetic for a man to spend the day alone. He runs to the store and buys a bottle of wine for Marlene and sparkling grape juice for Leslie. As he knocks on the door he worries that the grape juice was a bad idea, but Leslie beams at him when she takes it.

Marlene pours three glasses, handing one of the glasses of wine to Ben and the grape juice to Leslie. Both women take sips of their beverages before putting them down and going back to preparing the meal.

"You can peel and cut the potatoes," Leslie instructs. "Peeler is in that drawer."

He opens the drawer she's pointing at and digs through the various gadgets. He can't find it, but knows he just can use a knife instead. He sits down on a stool in front of the island and starts to peel and cut, throwing the pieces into a pot as he watches Leslie check on the turkey.

"So, Ben," Marlene says, sipping on her wine, "how's your girlfriend?"

"Oh. We broke up."

Out of the corner of his eye, Ben sees Leslie freeze.

"Hmm." Marlene takes another sip. "That's too bad."

"It's fine," Ben says, meaning it. There's a lot of reasons why he and Shauna didn't work, only one of which was him having feelings for his underage neighbor. "We were incompatible."

"That reminds me-" Marlene turns to Leslie, "Mark called again."

"Did you-"

"Tell him to stick it like you asked? Yes. And then he said, oh, well will you tell her I'm sorry and to please call me?"

Leslie groans, spinning around so fast Ben forgets he's supposed to be cutting the potatoes. "The only reason he's doing it is he thinks if he says he's sorry I'll let him go after Ann. As if Ann wants anything to do with his dumb ass."

Marlene doesn't reprimand Leslie for her curse. "Both of you can do better."

Leslie smiles softly at her mom before turning to Ben. "Hey, you. Get to work."

Ben laughs, picking the knife back up. "Yes, ma'am."

Later, after stuffing himself with turkey and sides and pie, he thanks Marlene and Leslie for inviting him over and goes home.

He's not surprised when Leslie follows him.

"I'm sorry about Shauna."

"It's really fine," Ben says, wishing she wasn't so close and that he had stopped at the second glass of wine because his stomach is burning and he can feel the molecules around him and the world feels like it's spinning when she touches his face. "I'm sorry about Mark."

"I'm not."

More than ever, Ben wants to cross the line. He's about to lean in when Leslie lets go of him, stepping back before he can.

"I'm glad you came."

"Me too."

He doesn't watch her go back into her apartment. .

-

Soon, it's almost Christmas. On his day off, he goes to the Smithsonian, hoping to find presents for his relatives. He's bought most of his presents off of Amazon, but he wants to get his brother and sister something more thoughtful.  

Ok, really he just just wants to walk around the Air and Space museum.

He's looking at the Apollo 11 command module Columbia when she appears next to him. He sighs when he sees her, and if it was anyone else he would think she was stalking him, but Ben knows better. She's Leslie Knope. She probably comes to the Smithsonian once a week.

"I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid."

"What stopped you?"

"Fear of heights."

Leslie cackles. "That'll do it. I've only ever wanted to be president."

"Really?" Ben asks as they walk together, to the next exhibit. "You didn't want to be like a singer or an actress or whatever?"

"Nope. You should see the campaign ads I made when I was ten. They're adorable."

It's on the tip of his tongue to tell her he thinks she's adorable. "You might change your mind someday, you know. I mean, look at these guys. They made bicycles."

"Do you think I should?" It sounds like she's asked this question a hundred times, to a hundred different people.

"Not at all," Ben tells her, "I'm going to run your campaign, remember?"

Her smile lights up his world.

-

A week before Christmas, she's on his couch, foot propped up on the coffee table with an ice pack on her ankle, yelling at _Wheel of Fortune_ and eating the fudge she gave him the day before. The moment he saw her on the stairs outside the building, wincing every time she tried to put weight on her foot, he scooped her up and brought her upstairs.

" _Man of La Mancha_! No, don't spin, what are you doing? You're going to go bankrupt!"

"That's not true," Ben says, picking a piece of fudge off the plate. "Sometimes they lose a turn."

The wheel lands on lose a turn and he smirks at her. "See?"

Leslie sticks her tongue at him. "Jerk," she says, but there's no heat in it as she turns back as the next  contestant lands on free play.

"G."

"Nooo!" Leslie throws her hands in the air. "You don't waste a free space on a consonant!"

"Especially the wrong one," Ben says, the third contestant already asking Pat Sajak if he can solve the puzzle.

The show goes to commercial break. "You hungry?"

"Always," Leslie answers, and Ben chuckles as he gets up. He takes the ice pack off and shakes his head at her swelling ankle. "It's okay." Her voice is soft, as if she knows he's worried. "Just a sprain, nothing broken."

"Right," Ben says, flashing to a reality where he can kiss her before going to the kitchen.

Ben opens his fridge to find a jar of jalapenos, a block of dried out cheese and four eggs.

"I really need to go grocery shopping," Ben says, closing the door. "Pizza?"

"Sure!"

He pulls the number from his favorite place off the fridge. "What you want?"

"Extra cheese is fine," she says. "Do you ever think the reason the man has a hard time keeping an erection might be because he's in a separate bathtub?"

Ben laughs, even though what now he's imagining her in his bathtub with him, completely naked and covered in bubbles.

He orders a small pizza for her and a calzone for himself. They tell him it'll be close to fifty minutes because of the weather.

At least he has eggs if there's an emergency.

Come to think of it, he can't remember when he actually bought those eggs.

He sits back down next to her as _Wheel Of Fortune_ comes back on, placing a new ice pack on her ankle. It's a prize puzzle. "Bet you an eclair from Doug's that they go to Hawaii."

"You're on, mister."

She ends up winning, because they go to Cancun.

It doesn't matter though, because he's not thinking about having to buy Leslie an eclair or _Wheel of Fortune_ or even about how he's hungry. No, he's thinking about how her hand is on top of his and her head is on his shoulder and absolutely none of his fantasies prepared him for this.

It's one thing for him to fantasize about fucking her. He can't actually do it.

"You decided on a school yet?"

"Georgetown, probably."

"That's a good school."

"And it's close," she says, drawing a happy face on the back of his hand. "I wouldn't have to move."

"That's a plus." Ben's not sure how much he can take.

"Your hands are so much bigger than mine," she says, and he has a hard time accepting that's what she really said, because it's so on par with his dreams. Leslie picks his hand up and places her palm against his.

"Is it true what they say about guys with big hands?"

Is he dreaming? Did he go through some kind of portal to another dimension where up is down and down is up and Leslie comes onto him?

He drops his hand. "What?"

Ben expects her boldness to disappear, for her to look away and blush, but that's also a fantasy, because she squares her shoulders and locks her eyes with his.

"I like you."

Ben reaches for the remote without looking, turns of the television because he can't hear anything except his blood pumping in his ears anyway.

"Fuck."

This time, Leslie does deflate. "I'm sorry. Ann said I should do something about my crush and she said that move always works for her."

Ben continues to say nothing. Somewhere, there's a reality where he admits it did work and pulls her into him, but in this one, all he can do is stare at her. For a second he wonders if her slipping on the ice was part of this plan too.

She's underage. He's a decade older than her. "I can't."

"I know," she says it like she's expected that answer even if it disappoints her. It breaks his heart, because the last thing he wants to do is reject Leslie Knope.

She looks away, at his Christmas tree. "Are those presents from your family?"

"Some of them," Ben answers, trying to be grateful for the change in subject. "There's a couple things in there that are presents to myself though."

She makes a face at him. "Really? Do you wrap them yourself?"

"God no. That would be pathetic. I have the woman at Macy's do it."

He almost misses the bell ring because of Leslie's laughter.

"I'll be right back. Don't try to get up," he says, grabbing his wallet so he can go fetch their food.

When he comes back, she's watching _Chopped_.

"What are the ingredients?" he asks, fetching plates and a fork for his calzone.

"Um, rack of lamb, licorice, and some other stuff."

"Oh, I hear some other stuff is hard to work with."

Leslie sticks her tongue at him. He sticks his back at her and cuts into his calzone with his fork.

"You know those are just pizza that's harder to eat."

"They're a perfect portable Italian fast food delivery system."

"Yeah? Then why are you eating it with a fork?"

"Because- oh hush."

She laughs again and this time, when she moves closer, he lifts his arm and drapes it across her shoulders. It's not long before she's asleep, snoring softly against him.

They stay that way until her mother comes home.

-

On New Year's Eve, Ben goes to a party at a senator's house. He goes mostly to network, to shake hands with the who's who of D.C. He's surrounded by beautiful women, most of them single and probably willing,  but he leaves before midnight. On his way home he discovers a drunk message on his phone from an ex back in Indiana, but he ignores it, knowing she doesn't really want him to call her back.

He watches _Homeland_ instead of the New Year's celebrations.

Two minutes to midnight, Leslie knocks on his door. She's dressed in red, her hair falling out of its pins. For a moment, they say nothing, content to just stand and stare each other as if silently daring the other to cross the line, just this once. Seeing a pin coming out, Ben reaches for it. 

Outside, fireworks off, signaling the beginning of a new year, but Ben's too busy tasting strawberries on Leslie's lips to care.

"Happy New Year," she says, as he pulls her inside, breaking every promise he's made to himself since meeting her.


End file.
